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Struggling as a Teenager
For all of you that are teenagers and struggling with pornography, my heart goes out to you.  I repeatedly tried and failed before I finally figured out that an addiction to pornography is just too big of an issue to handle alone. So I’ll get right to the point.  Since you can’t beat this alone you are going to have to share it with someone … and that someone should be one of your parents (if for some reason you don’t live with your parents, or would feel physically threatened by your parents, then tell someone that you know has your best interests at heart).  I know that sharing something like this isn’t easy and it is going to take some real guts on your end to pull it off, but I can guarantee you it is worth it.

In my struggle with pornography, it took me about six years before I shared it with anyone.  That’s a long time of feeling alone in a battle that isn’t being won.  Looking back, I wish I had shared it right when I started struggling — I would have saved so many years that were wasted in this addiction.   There were two things that kept me from sharing my addiction: I was embarrassed and I was afraid that I would be disappointing those in my family.  If this is also holding you back I want to encourage you to overcome those fears.  

Disappointing Your Parents
What will your parents’ reaction be when you share with them that you are struggling with pornography?  I can’t tell you – I have never met them so I can only tell you how I would react as a parent.  I am a father and if my son came to me and let me know that he was struggling with pornography I would have several emotions:

1. I would feel angry.  Not at my son, but at myself for not better protecting my son from the issues that the world is throwing at him.
2. I would be sad that he was struggling with this temptation alone.
3. I would be proud of him for coming to me to let me know.  It isn’t an easy thing to do and any parent will realize that.

Most parents are going to have similar feelings.  So I would encourage you to not let your fear of disappointing others get in the way of sharing about your struggles.

How Embarrassing!
Is it possible to share something that is this embarrassing with your parents?  Guess what … when I was a teenager I couldn’t have told mine … at least not verbally.  If you can, that’s great; you have more guts than I do.  Pick the parent you feel most comfortable with and let them know you need to talk with them.  If you are like me and are embarrassed to bring up the subject there is another option … writing a note or letter.  Let them know that you have struggled with pornography and need their help in getting rid of it from your life.  It doesn’t have to be long … you are just wanting to let them know the basics in the letter so later you can talk about it openly with them.  Here is an example:

The Discussion
So now you have opened up the lines of communication with a parent what should you discuss?  Start off by being honest with them on what you are viewing and when you are accessing it.  If, for example, you are struggling with pornography while they are away at work or after everyone is in bed then it would be a good idea to ask them to create a password that would be required to access the internet.  That way they can allow you to be online when they are available to monitor you.  If your computer is located in an area where the screen isn’t visible from someone walking in the room then reconfigure the computer so that anyone that comes in will see what you are looking at.  Another thing you might ask them to do is periodically check in with you to see how you are doing.  Be honest and let them know if you stumble again.  Now I know this sounds like you are putting a bunch of restrictions on yourself, but this will free you from the pressure of the temptation … so it is completely worth it.  

Here’s the Challenge
You can’t beat this alone, so keeping it a secret will only prevent you from winning the battle.  Overcome your fear and share it with a family member this week.  So grab a piece of paper and decide who you are going to share it with, when you are going to share it with them, and how you are going to share it with them.  Don’t waste any more of your life on pornography.

Comments If you would like to read comments posted by other visitors or post a comment with your opinion on this subject visit the Comments Section . If you committed to sharing this with a parent, then please bookmark this page and come back and post a comment with the results of how you feel now that you have shared your struggles. The only thing that will be posted by your comment is your name — you may choose to leave an email address to receive follow up comments but it will not be posted on the blog.